Buried

This is the horrible piece of cinema that makes me want to blog. Oh Ryan Reynolds how I love you, but what where you thinking when you decided you needed the money for this bag of garbage. If you are anyone who knows what a good movie looks like, then I'm sure you will agree this is not that movie. I've never sat through a more disappointing movie (well that's not true, Twilight did just ruin vampire movies forever). If anyone actually wants to see this movie, let me save you an hour and half. Just watch the first 5 minutes and last 5 minutes. It's alright I'll wait, go watch it. There you're back, k, so I'll fill ya in that the 80 minutes you didn't watch, nothing changes. It's just him laying in a box in the ground. Sure he matures from using a lighter to a cell phone and finally a glow stick, but no one should have to suffer through that 80 minutes of total hell. Finally we get to the ending. Now just when you woke up from your nap and see he is still in the box you think "So maybe there will be a sweet ending where he gets out and kills the kidnapper and make the whole crappy movie worth it". Nope he gets a phone call and dies. HE DIES, end of movie. What you're telling me you used up all your good ideas by coming up with the lighter and cell phone aspects of the movie and had nothing left for an entertaining ending. Guess it was getting close to happy hour at the local Applebee's when the writer decided a Cosmo was better than thinking of a decent ending. And for that I say don't watch this movie, skip right over it and don't hurt your brain by trying to process how you just wasted 90 minutes of you life this way. Instead do what the creators did and get completely wasted and kill all your brain cells that way instead.
Rating: 1 Yeti roar out of 5